Have you ever seen the look on a child's face when he receives his first toy? The excitement, the pleasure and happiness that is born in his heart but is apparent even on his face? The smile that knows no limits along with that sparkle in the eye? I'm sure many will have, especially those who have little brothers and sisters of nephew. Their happiness is so sincere and radiant that it has enough power to make us happy; it can bring a smile to our faces even on the dullest of days... On the other hand, have you ever seen a child that has just lost or broken his favourite toy? The anger and despair in his heart? The feeling of loneliness and depression? The tears that travel down his eyes only to reach his dry lips? Such powerful sorrow that it makes even oldest of people want to go out and replace that toy. Some are fortunate; their toy can be replaced. But some are less fortunate for them what they had was valueless; it meant something to them, something that they broke. Some time back I also got something... How long back I don't know... But it seems like it has always been there for me whenever I was in need. When I was said I knew all I had to do was reach out and it would be there. Whenever life seemed to be cruel to me and I was fighting a hopeless battle I knew at the back of my mind that I was not alone... I knew that my friend would always be there for me. I knew that even though I was in my room, surrounded by emptiness her friendship was there for me, that she could hear the whispers of my pain... I knew she was irreplaceable and special... But last night, I broke her heart... I left her in tears and in the process I broke my heart too. I felt like that little kid who had just broken his very first birthday present... I felt lonely and lost. I didn't know how to say I was sorry because in my mind and heart I knew that no sorry would ever make up for the one tear that she lost because of me... Today I woke up in the morning despite not having slept. I felt something missing and something was not right... Ever had a teddy? One that is with you the last thing at night cuddled up next to you? One that is there first thing in the morning when you open your eyes... Imagine that one night you done something to that teddy and never slept all night... Then when your eyes shut for a moment or two and you looked in the morning it wasn't there... No one to give you a big hug before you faced the unfriendly world... Let me tell you, a life that is lead after breaking a friend's heart is like fighting a losing battle. It's like living but because you have to not because you want to... The point is... Never break a Heart... I'm sorry my friend. Although you'll forgive me, my heart will never forget the sound of those tears burning through my heart like acid.
Let us Ponder...
Tuesday night brought along with it many visitors and family. I sat there 'entertaining' my guests. Each minute seemed to drag, as though time wanted to come to a standstill. Well, as I was sitting there, one of my nephews started to get a fever (sorry Kid, didn't know mine was cathching)... Anyways, I sat there and I looked at him winge & cry and toss & turn. The longer I looked at him and studied his behaviour then more stronger my migraine became. I could surely not blame the kid, but hey, it wasn't my fault either. So i just sat there and watched the kid do his magic while his parents ran from one side to another in a desperate effort to make him feel better. Then the nail hit me on my head, this provoking thought... Hang on, is this what kids are like?! Damn, I don't think I could handle one of them... Despite this thought, I knew my love for kids would not decrease. But the thought that hit me is the fact our parents struggle and bear with us throuout our childhood, they give us a roof, love, support and the backing in our young age and in return they don't demand, but expect to be looked after and respected in their old age...
They sacrifice their yoouth for ours, their confort for ours, their sleep for ours... Have our hearts died? Why can we not sacrifice a little for them? I can sure remember times when I have not been the best of children. I can recall over a hundred incidents where I have not liked the actions of words of my parents... But so what, they shouted at me, they done something I didn't want them to do...
But today I realised, that if they did not love me, I would have been in the skip of someone's back yard like the many stories we read... I want to end this day by saying... O Allah, thank you for the greatest gift... My parents... ps. hate you mum & dad ;)